You need to douche – It’s A part of gay life

All gay people are familiar with douching and know what it means. It means what, douche until the water becomes clear. Only then will you know if you’re bottom ready. For “breeders” this can seem a bit crude, but for us – especially my bottom gays- it is a way of life. A tenet by which we must live by to avoid a crappy situation. Literally!

This statement has a meaning much more profound than it seems. For many gay people, their sexual role serves as their gay identity. Straight people don’t need to worry about this as much as gay people do, their roles are usually pretty clear.

The ones with the holes are the receivers and the ones with the poles are the givers. 

Why does gay culture exist?

Roman men were free to enjoy sex with other males without a perceived loss of masculinity or social status.

For us, the gay population, mainstream culture (heteronormative habits) can be bland and boring. However, many people lack understanding of why it seems so lame to us. Let’s be clear, there are some homosexuals who are not culturally gay. I’m not referring to a man who has sex with men, rather someone who embraces our lifestyle and identifies as culturally gay. 

Before we can even think about explaining this to someone straight, we need to help them understand what it is. This is is how the majority of people act and their customs. Gay subcultures form within our community because we are the minority worldwide. 

If we look at societies around the world we can see big differences in Chinese, American, Mexican and any other countries. Each of these places are unique and it affects the foods people eat, their clothing styles and even the way they speak and interact. People understand this well, but why do they struggle to understand ours?

This is nonsense and demonstrates ignorance. We just need to help people recognize that as gays our culture exists because in every society around the world we are viewed as different. We have developed our own ways of speaking, interacting, and have our own values.

Gay values

So let me be frank here, gay culture is nasty. It’s rude, crude and sometimes a bit too much for breeders to handle. 

Living in the 20th century you would think that seeing a gay couple kissing on tv would not be a huge deal. Yet, when Lil Nas X decided to make out with two men on TV the FCC lost their minds. Gay subcultures exist for a reason – our society is as diverse as that of our hetero counterparts. 

Gay customs have a lot of rich history with cruising. A lot of cultural practices that we have are about sex. Straight people throughout the centuries have in essence forced us to find ways to meet. It’s not like this in all countries, though. In many parts of Europe there are places that accept us and give us safe spaces. 

France and Spain are great examples and they offer many excellent cruising places. They keep us safe and allow us to have fun with like minded people. Places like the ones below exemplify our way of life and has its roots in our history. Just be aware that not all places in Europe are as open – Hungary is currently experiencing hardships!


Club Cumming in New York has a quasiqueer atmosphere that will make for a perfect night out!

Berlin in Chicago’s Boystown is a must-go hotspot for an 80’s vibe – perhaps you’ll get a faint scent of poppers. 

Eagle bar in Houston is undoubtedly the best place to grab a drink and experience some bear culture. 


Le next Cruising bar in Paris is top notch. it a great place to grab a drink and cruise for some fun!

Berlin Dark in Barcelona is an excellently designed Fetish cruising club. It’s full of culture! 

Eagle Manchester is our favorite pick for the UK. The top portion is lovely and light, and the bottom floor is dark and they sell excellent poppers. 


Silom Soi 4 in Bangkok Thailand is an excellent place to get a drink! It’s a street full of gay bars!

Taipei I/O has a great hattenba experience! It’s a great way to experience authentic Taiwanese LGBT lifestyles. 

South America

Club 69 in Buenos Aires is a complete experience with live music and even a darkroom. 

Experience the gay lifestyle

If you want to experience LGBT culture to the core, visit a European country, see a drag show, or go cruising – just be safe! Also, remember, just because a place is targeted at the gay community doesn’t mean that it will be for the gays.

Stay safe and have a gay day!

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